There are times when I have difficulty finding something to write about here. I’ve had a bad day, or maybe a so-so day. Or maybe I can’t think of something I haven’t already written about. Maybe nothing has sparked for me recently or I haven’t had that moment
of beauty, joy, or love.
And then I realize that love and soul aren’t always beautiful or joyful. Sometimes they are ugly and hard. And that’s a truth we don’t acknowledge often. We shove it out of sight and pretend, at least in public, everything is lovely and easy.
It’s okay for things to be difficult. It’s okay to struggle to find the positive, the beautiful, they joy. It’s okay to acknowledge things aren’t perfect, or even good. It’s human to lose sight of the little lights when the darkness makes everyday life a challenge.
I find a quiet kind of joy in knowing that by sharing my difficulties, my imperfections, I may help someone else realize they’re not alone. It’s hard to be human, to have human frailties and weaknesses, when we see everyone’s edited lives online.
There’s a beautiful symmetry in finding a topic for this post as a result of admitting I was having difficulty finding something beautiful and joyful to write about. And my writing about it, thinking it through, sharing my humanity, how I feel has changed. I was feeling blah/meh when I started writing. As I’ve written, my mood has lightened, I’ve relaxed, and I feel better about myself and more optimistic.
Admitting and accepting our frailties, our imperfections, is a reflection of our love and our souls. Not always joyful and beautiful, but always capable of returning to those states.